10 ways to be a better babysitter

Babysitting can be a fun, yet challenging experience. I babysit for our neighbor plus I've had almost 7 years of experience with my little siblings. While I am certainly not a perfect babysitter, I have learned a lot since the first time my parents left my older brother and me alone with Elijah. Without further ado, here is what I've learned in my babysitting years!

This post was inspired by Mayim's post from The Braided Vine!

Be playful

Kids don't like bossy babysitters. Think about it - they are bossed around all day by their parents, teachers, coaches, etc. Do they really need an extra person to tell them what to do? Of course you need to make sure they are safe and listening to you, but try to be as fun as possible when you ask them to do something. You can get them to do something without sounding annoying, and in fact, are more effective this way.  The three-year-old that I babysit for (we'll call her "M") always tells her mom, "Emeren's my friend!" Not to pat myself on the back or anything, but this is most likely due to me being a fun sitter. I don't yell at her or nag her. I don't boss her around. I tell her what I need to say to keep her safe and happy. (And, of course, I bring a bunch of fun stuff in my backpack 😉)

Took my little sis to the beach!

Don't give them bribes

Okay, this one is pretty hard. When they are melting down on the floor because you told them to put their pajamas on, it's pretty difficult not to offer them something to silence their cries. Bribing them leads them to think that bad behavior will get them a treat. Instead of bribing them, try:

• Talking through it. It can be hard (well, they are melting down on the floor) but at least show the child that you are there to listen. 
• Being playful. If they don't want to get ready to go outside, try having a race to see who can get ready the quickest.
• Be flexible. If you don't have a good reason for doing what they don't want, let them have it their way! Also, offer alternatives.
• If you really need to, phrase it differently. For example, instead of "I'll give you a cookie if you finish your homework without complaining," say "After you finish your homework without complaining, we'll have cookies" or even "I was planning on giving you cookies after you finish your homework, but I can't give it to you if you don't do your homework or keep complaining." 

Prepare activities beforehand

No one likes sitting around the house thinking of what to do. Come up with a list of activities to do before you arrive at their house. You and the child can choose something to do from the list. Remember to be flexible, though! If they want to build with Legos instead of color, let them. Sometimes you'll find that they have the whole day planned out!

Bring something with you

Whenever I go to M's to babysit, I try to bring something from my house that I think she'll enjoy. This is pretty easy since M is Eliyah's age - and they're both girls 😄Sometimes, when M is waking up, I'll tell her about something I have in my bag and she'll get ready in a flash. If you don't have siblings, this may be a little harder since you don't have an abundant supply of toys (unless you kept them 😉) However, try to keep your eye out while you're at a store, because these things can be pretty cheap! Here are some ideas by age group (some of toys work in multiple age groups!):

Toddler (2-4)

• Dolls
• Toy cars/vehicles (even if they have a lot - kids get soooo excited about new vehicles)
• Chalk 
• Tea set
• Bubble machine (this is M's favorite!)
• Stickers
• Stuffed animal (M requested two puppies once)
• Puzzles
• Craft
• Memory match/other card games that are their level
• Candy Land/Chutes and Ladders/Other board games that are their level

Middle kid (5-7)

• Paper for paper airplanes/a book on how to make them (my little brother LOVES paper airplanes)
• Toy cars/ vehicles 
• Dolls
• Chalk
• Craft
• Puzzles
• Go Fish/War/Old Maid/other card games
• Connect Four/Sorry/other board games

Older kid (8-10)

• Craft
• Shopkins (idk if these are still popular, but I loved these at this age)
• Anything you thought was cool at their age
• Dolls (some still like them at this age. I liked LOL surprise dolls)
• SLIME (this was all the rage do you guys remember)
• Squishies
• Puzzles
• Paper for orgami or paper airplanes

Get trained in CPR

I got trained in First Aid/CPR/AED earlier this year. You never know when you could use these skills to save someone's life - whether it's a babysitting charge, your sibling, or a stranger. Besides having the ability to save your charge's life, being trained in CPR also makes the parent more likely to choose you over someone else. They can rest assured knowing that if their child is in trouble, you'll know how to help.

Don't sit them in front of a screen

Technology certainly has its benefits, but you weren't hired to turn around and have a TV babysit the kids. If the parents say that it is okay to use screens, go ahead, but I personally like to use it as a last resort. Kids seek interaction, and using screens is not the way to give this to them.

Don't sit yourself in front of a screen, either!

Kids need interaction. Give them full attention while babysitting for them. Keep your phone nearby in case their parents need to reach you, but don't text anyone else, except maybe your own parents if it's important. (If they are just checking on you, send a quick text but don't chat too long!)

Be a thoughtful sitter

Remember their birthdays by making them a card or giving them flowers. (I know, it might seem silly to give flowers to a little kid - but I gave M some lilacs from my garden and she gave me the sweetest smile!) Help them make a gift for their parents on Mother's Day, Father's Day, birthdays, or Christmas. Ask them how their soccer match went. Babysitting is not just for the money. Be a friend to your charges, because they aren't just charges - they are people.

Ask questions

Don't be afraid to ask their parents questions. They will most likely be happy to answer them because they want the best care for their child! Here are a few examples of what to ask:

• Do they have any allergies?
• Can they have sweets?
• When should they have for snack and what is okay for them to have?
• Can they change by themselves?
• Is there anything they shouldn't play with?
• What should I do if they misbehave?
• Is there anything else I should know?

Sometimes, the parents will tell you the answers to these questions before you ask. 

Always listen to them

Every human deserves the right to be listened to. No matter what the child is saying, no matter how silly what they are saying may sound, give them a chance to finish talking. Don't interrupt them - wait until they are finished talking before you say anything. Kids are cut off a lot, especially by adults. You can be the one who listens. 

Bonus: What to do if they miss their parents

Even my little sister misses our mom from time-to-time. If the child misses their mom or dad, try to comfort them. Remind them that their parents will come back. It can be helpful to read books - we love Llama Llama Misses Mama. It's actually about going to school, but it works for Eliyah! Sometimes, when Mama walks in the door, she says "Mama Llama, you came back!" just like Llama Llama did 😊 Younger kids might enjoy this song from Daniel Tiger. Eliyah sings it all the time! The full show is Episode 3 of Daniel Tiger Season 1.  If possible, call/video call their parents. Little disclaimer for this one: don't do it if you think the parents are busy/it will upset the child even more! Use your own judgment 😉

After talking, have fun! Distracting them with games, crafts, books (M always seems to feel better after I read), going outside, etc. really helps. If you hear those uncontrollable giggles, you know you are doing something right 😉

Your turn!

Do you babysit? What are some things you've learned as a babysitter? How much do you charge? Do the kids think you are a good babysitter?